Let’s face it: For a lot of us, delegating can be hard. Even though we might know intellectually that it would be to our benefit to ask for help, we resist.
Yet time and again, I’ve seen people’s lives expand in ways they never imagined simply because they were willing to accept the support of others. Client and single mom Melinda, for instance, realized her dream of publishing her first book once she’d embraced the help of family members and other caregivers so she could have time to write. She’s now working on her second book.
And she admits regret over the heavy self-judgment she once held about not being Supermom. She understands that if she had not sought help to create some me-time, she’d still be stuck. Today, she’s proud of the role model she’s embodied for her daughter.
Why Is It So Darned Hard to Welcome Help?
Do you keep putting off things you want to do because of the same old excuses like “no time” or “they can’t manage without me”?
While there’s often a degree of truth there, chances are you may also be erecting some unintentional roadblocks for yourself. Here are a few of the most common:
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- Control
Resistance can come from wanting to maintain control – to micro-manage every detail of every little thing we do.
- Control
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- Perfectionism
Somehow, we think that our acting alone is the only insurance for perfect results. But there is no “perfect” – except, as they say, as an enemy of the good. What’s good enough for a perfectionist is perfect for everyone else.
- Perfectionism
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- Money
Some of us balk at spending on ourselves. But I see this as penny-wise, pound-foolish. Investing in yourself sends a powerful message that you’re worth it and that your dreams matter. If you’re not willing to invest in yourself, why should you expect others to?
- Money
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- Fear
Sometimes we get so used to aiming low and playing small, growth feels scary: What if I fail? What if I make a mistake? What if, what if, what if…? Well, what if you succeed?
- Fear
The good news: Just as we put up such roadblocks ourselves, it is fully in our power to take them down. Keep going. Learn from your mistakes. Improve on what works; change what doesn’t. Trust in the process.
And don’t forget to celebrate success along the way. Reward yourself now and again!
Prepare yourself, too, for the possibility of deeply rewarding collaborations. Imagine the feeling of having someone – or better yet, a whole team – supporting your dreams!
Feels good, doesn’t it?
I promise that whatever you dislike doing, there’s someone out there making a living at it. Odds are they do it better, more quickly and more creatively – and are ready and eager to support your efforts. It could be making a web page, cleaning your home, designing a business card, crafting a safe workout program…
The possibilities are endless because we’re all different and our hearts resonate at different frequencies. You’re the only one who can ultimately determine where your heart is pulling you.
And…once you feel that tug…consider asking for support. Really. It makes a difference.
Suggested Practice
Where and what can you delegate so that you have more time to do the things that make your heart sing?
This week, choose one task that you’re willing to delegate. And make it worthwhile. Don’t just delegate randomly and leave it at that. Mindfully decide in advance how you will use the extra time, whether a half-day or just a half hour.
And remember: You don’t have to fill that time with busy-ness. Schedule a massage. Enjoy time in nature. See a movie. Read a book. Notice how the act of balancing out the musts with replenishing activities can bring everything into focus and revitalize you in unexpected ways.